Category Archives: Digitalisation

Beyond Ridiculous!

Beyond Ridiculous!
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

A 9 year old child with fits / seizures was taken to a renowned Paediatric Neurologist. He started treatment with one of the most commonly recommended (by almost all textbooks) used medicine in the treatment of seizures: carbamazepine. One of the most effective medicine, used since over 50 years in children, that can cause side effects of rashes in less than 1/1000 cases. Still rarely, the side effects can be very severe, causing extensive damage to the skin.
The doctor explained this to the child’s parents, and then started the recommended doses. Pediatric doctors are the best trained doctors in dose calculation, they are more aware than any other specialty about the side effects in general, because children often cannot even speak and parents may not notice some side effects. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Every medicine has side effects. Even vitamins do. Any medicine can potentially cause life threatening reaction, and that’s why the common warning with each medicine: do not use if you are sensitive to this medicine. How will one know whether there will be any allergy / reaction to the medicine without having used it?

Most medicines can cause side effects at high doses, but some can cause dangerous reactions even with the tiniest dose, or test dose. Some medicines (even the one mentioned above) can cause side effects after many months / years of safe use. While the dose dependent (high dose= higher side effect) side effects are somewhat predictable, the ‘idiosyncratic’ (meaning occurring in individual, not all cases, because of the natural tendency of that person) and “allergic” side effects are totally unpredictable, and can be caused by even such common medicines as paracetamol, aspirin, antibiotics or vitamins. Even deaths have been reported after the use of some common medicines, but even in the highly legalized western world, no court holds doctors guilty for the side effects of medicines, if these were discussed and informed to the patient / family. This is against common sense. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

This child unfortunately developed a rare but well known side effect of this drug, called Stevens Johnson Syndrome (severe skin rashes), had to be admitted and treated, it cost them one lac rupees. While we sympathise with the child and the family, and wish them the best recovery and health, this is hardly the mistake of a doctor.
But the forum, in a regressive decision, held the doctor guilty, fined him 90000 rupees. This is beyond ridiculous. The court observed that “ if the doctor knew that this drug can cause side effects, he should not have prescribed it”. Translated intellectually, that means NO DOCTOR CAN PRESCRIBE ANY MEDICINE! © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Moreover, what will this court advise for the child now? Every seizure medicine has some rare dangerous side effects. There are no medicines free of side effects. Shall the child be left without treatment now? Which doctor will want to treat such a case? Which court will guarantee that the rarest of the rare side effect cannot happen again in this case, and with such ill-informed forums, the next doctor trying to do good to the child will not be held guilty? © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Technically, if using a drug that can cause side effects is a crime as per this court, it should hold everyone concerned guilty: the textbooks / medical bodies that recommend this drug, the pharma which produced it, and even the government which allowed it to be sold. Applying the same logic, if some child developed peanut allergy in a hotel or side effects of pollution and dust by travelling on Bangalore roads, will this court hold the hotelier or the city administration guilty and punish them too? Has this forum/ court banned tobacco and alcohol yet, or will it punish the government for the side effects and thousands of deaths caused by these? © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The IMA, other medical bodies, Neurological society, and intellectuals should stand by this doctor who has suffered the mental agony. This decision must be challenged in higher courts.
We regret that some patients suffer side effects, no one should, but at the same time, the “side effects of medicine” is not the doctor’s fault, especially in this case where he had explained the parents about such possibility.
We need medically educated forums and judges who can refrain from populist tendencies.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
PS:
I respect courts. I respect higher courts more. But I refuse to believe that every decision made by every judge is correct, that every decision is impartial, that it is not affected by pressures. This article is solely based upon the attached news clip. I must admit that this reporter Ms. Meghna Singhania has done an excellent and impartial reporting. Doctors must please stand united against this decision.

https://medicaldialogues.in/side-effects-of-prescribed-m…/…/

What Your Doctor Never Tells You

What Your Doctor Never Tells You

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

This small girl who had had her third convulsion in last three days was now looking frail. Her mother, extremely anxious, asked me what can be done to “immediately stop” her convulsions. This hyper-mother had stopped all the epilepsy medicines of this kid few days ago. Patiently, I asked why.

“Because I read on an article describing ‘what your doctor hides from you’, in which the author had recommended a particular diet of natural ingredients “, she replied, adding “the article said that all allopathic doctors give you medicines that will keep you sick for longer, so that they can earn more. It also said operations like joint replacements or procedures like angioplasty should never be done.”

Needless to say, this lady was buying the “Purest Natural Guilt Free” products from that website, at a price that was way costlier than all of her allopathic medicine combined.

I told her that it was a mistake to stop the kid’s medicines, and issued her a new prescription. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“What do you do, mam?” I asked her.

“We run a bakery, I sell exotic cakes, muffins etc.” she replied.

“Do you lie to your customers? Do you sell them products that will harm or kill them?” I asked.

“No, never! How will my business run then? We have to obtain licenses for food quality.” she retorted.

“It is the same about us doctors, mam. All the medicines, stents and joints that your article has slammed, are approved by government, and additionally, they are scientific products, not just claims. The government also earns tax on each medicine, stent or joint sold in India”.

I was offended somewhere, and so continued:

“We come from similar families as yours, mam. Even our parents teach us culture, compassion and good habits just as yours do. We doctors learn in the same schools as you, and common school teachers have taught us the importance of good. We too have parents, spouses and family, kids whom we teach good values by practice. Why will such doctors hide the truth from you and suggest you something that will harm you, who have come to us in good faith? Do you presume that all of the thousands of brilliant patriotic doctors will hide a cure from patients, and continue to let people suffer? Just because some bakery is selling rotten cakes, how would you like someone badmouthing your bakery, your integrity? ”

“Not you doctor, but not all doctors are like you” she said.

“Thank you for your faith mam, but I know that most doctors are like myself, who have struggled hard to achieve their degrees, to be able to save lives and bring an end to the suffering of millions. It is not an easy task, there are many easier ways to earn money with lesser hard work and sacrifice. You will rarely find the children of stars, sportsmen, industrialists and other ultra rich becoming doctors, no one wants so much hard work for such less money.” © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“We cannot advertise, while most of the alternative medicine companies, gurus and babas keep on blatantly claiming cures for incurable diseases, spreading rumors about allopathy and some other recognised pathies, cleverly selling their own products to desperate patients who hope for relief, and spend far more in the wrong direction. Look at who all is earning crores while claiming that allopathic doctors are cheating people”.

She said she agreed, and won’t interfere with the right treatment of her child now onwards.

This is a complication of a deliberate and sick propaganda which has been orchestrated to tarnish the image of especially allopathic doctors, to be able to sell innocent patients one’s own unscientific products. It is sad that the very people who complain about the consultation charges of qualified doctors go and buy extremely costly “magic remedies” like some unproven, unscientific laser instruments, vibrators, garments, herbals, extracts etc. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The fact that vegetables and fruits are costlier than many medicines, that weekly vegetable expenses or family dinners in India are far more pricey than a specialist’s consultation which can be obtained urgently, speak a lot about where we stand. In the developed western world, there are year-long waiting lists to see most specialists. The fact that Indian doctors are the best and hardest working is appreciated all over the world, but so many Indian gurus, babas and fraudulent quacks run campaigns against our own doctors, in our own country! © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Want to really know what the doctor doesn’t tell you?.

A doctor never tells you to go to herbal babas when you come to the emergency and need immediate attention. A doctor never asks you to take your lot to the websites that slam medical profession, when you need help. A doctor never abandons even a faithless and arrogant ignoramus, does not ask them to go search internet for blogs and natural remedies when someone is dying of a heart attack or a stroke or accident. While many recent fulminant ads claim that all doctors are greedy and deceptive, there are thousands of doctors in the hospitals all over world, who are not eating, sleeping or being with their family right now: not because they want more money, but because many will die if we don’t work hard. It is so sad that this had to be explained in India!

What a doctor really doesn’t tell you is: how difficult it is to treat and to save lives of the very people who have no faith in the one trying to do them good!

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

PS: Recently the number of posts circulating to slam all medical professionals, especially allopaths, have increased, especially in an attempt to market certain products. This extremely harmful trend is ignored by all concerned authorities. This article is an attempt to defend the glorious scientific profession I belong to.

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Which Is The Best Festival Upon Earth?

Which Is The Best Festival Upon Earth?
Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Happy Diwali” said Mr. Abdul as he entered with a box of sweets in the OPD.

Over five years ago he was admitted with a complete paralysis, and had fully recovered as he had reached the hospital within two hours of the onset of paralysis. Since then I had received his Diwali hampers without fail.

A happy gentleman who liked to make funny sarcastic comments (maybe Pune effect), he made me smile every time. “Your fees has increased, doctor, but my feelings of gratitude for you will not change” he said now, silently laughing: “Every Diwali I remember that I was admitted on the Laxmipooja day, and our family was worried if the specialist doctors will be available. My wife was praying that there should be some specialist doctor to attend my case all the way from home when I became unconscious” he recalled. Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Indeed, he was admitted on the auspicious festival day, the junior resident doctor had activated the stroke code, our team had rushed in. I was already in the hospital to see a VIP leader whose headache usually worsened on holidays and then many specialists had to be called in to ego-massage his headache. So I could see Mr. Abdul immediately, and explained to his family that his condition was critical, that there were risks of complications in the first few days. Uncertain with the new doctor, they requested that I talked to their family physician Dr. Feroz. I did.
This is but natural, and there was no reason to feel offended with the anxieties of a serious patient’s family. In the age of trustless relationships where couples check each other’s cellphones like detectives and parents and kids question each other’s intentions, it is hardly possible that a serious patient’s family will blindly trust a new doctor. Even some doctors distrust new (not senior / junior, but the one being consulted for the first time) doctors. The only possible solution is an understanding doctor who takes this in stride, refuses to be offended, and acts in the best interest of the patient, taking an extra step to make the worried family comfortable. There are indeed some who never trust anyone whatever one does to satisfy them, but that is their own cross to carry, one should simply ignore the ugly trait. It is well known that those patients who do not trust any doctor suffer worst, as they don’t take anyone’s advice seriously. Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Three days later, as Mr. Abdul recovered, the family breathed in some confidence, and started believing all that I explained, without having to involve their family physician. Since then, although I have advised that he does not require to see me now, and instead he can follow up with Dr. Feroz, Mr. Abdul visits me every six months for a check up. His wife calls me Rajabhai, a name I would not have allowed anyone to call me with, but couldn’t dare tell this to her!

This is a pretty standard picture across India, most of even the poorest recover well from strokes, accidents, burns, infections, fractures, heart attacks and various other emergencies if they reach hospital in time. While people all over the world wish happy festivities to each other, take holidays, revel and eat and enjoy, while leaders give long festive speeches from their farmhouses to please various voters according to mob IQs, it is the professionals like doctors and servicemen like police, military, etc.who slog and run to save lives. They forget family and enjoyment to be available for those who suffer. The perpetual thankless will immediately say “but this is a choice you made”, but not understand that this choice was made to be respected, to earn well and to save lives, not for the society, the skimpsters and politicians to take advantage of. To see the sick and crying, angry people, to witness death and disability on the very days that your family expects you to be happy with them is not something one can easily come to terms to, and this is lifelong, not a five year term with long vacations. Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The fact that millions of critical patients are attended well during the most auspicious festivals: Diwali, Eid, Christmas, and all other religious festivals included, is conveniently forgotten once the festivals are over, and then the mudslinging about medical professionals starts, with the long speeches advising doctors to work harder with lesser expectations. Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Doctor, this is not about Diwali or our religions” Mr. Abdul said while leaving, “this is to continue the tradition of humanity. There must be so many patients who can be with their families this festival, because some doctor worked hard to save them. This is my token of respect for those doctors”.

As always, I told Mr. Abdul that I was immensely grateful that the superpowers gave me this opportunity to be a doctor. I meant it. Dr. Rajas Deshpande

I often imagine: what if I was born with too much money, son of a rich father, with no worries for earning and no limits on spending, I would so much love to roam around the world in luxury cars and jets, among beautiful people (you understand), enjoying life to the brim, without caring for any suffering around me. In that case, I might have been very happy probably, but I won’t have respected myself as much. Even the most junior, newest recruit of a doctor is far superior to anyone who has chosen to cunningly ignore the suffering around, speaking big words and doing nothing about it.

Therein lies the best festivity in life: being a doctor, with an ability to abolish suffering and avert death.
Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Happy Diwali to all Patients, Medical Students, Junior and Senior Doctors, Resident Doctors, Nurses, Technicians and wardboys, Hospital staff and administrators, and to everyone who cares for others, showing it in their actions.

Homoglobin

Homoglobin

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“How much is your experience, doc? Have you ever seen any cases like this?” she asked. She was accompanying her father who had Parkinson’s Disease, quite common all over the world.

Many hilarious and abrasive retorts came to my mind:

‘Do you ask such questions about the pilot or driver when you board a plane or bus? , Do you ask such questions when someone absolutely inexperienced is made a minister of important portfolios like health, defence, environment etc.?’ If you can have faith in them, why cannot you trust your qualified doctor?© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

However, being on the doctor’s side of the table, I could not allow myself losing patience so easily. I chose the most professional answer, forcing a smile: “I am practicing since 25 years, over 15 as a Neurologist, and I have seen over two lac thirty thousand patients till now. Almost every Neurologist sees an average of 30-40 patients per day”.

When the rural / illiterate populace asks these questions innocently, I am never offended, but if it is the literate suspicious kind who treat manners and etiquette as an ‘optional’ part of communicating with the doctor, I feel just like when someone spills my ice-cream. It is difficult to connect with a paranoid literate, however hard one tries.

Apparently satisfied with my experience, she shot her next google bullet: “Can this happen because of his low Homoglobin? I read it on a blog.”

“The correct term is Hemoglobin”, I told her, “and its low level does not cause Parkinson’s”.

It was over 45 minutes since they entered, I had replied to every point on the question paper that they had prepared from a Googlesearch syllabus. The next patient must be already angry now, I thought.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“How can you be so sure that this is Parkinson’s Disease? What’s the proof?” Fired she.

“There are many diseases where there are no proofs of diagnosis, some can be proven, most are based upon the doctor’s clinical judgement. Sometimes quite costly tests are required to prove what is an obvious diagnosis. You are welcome to obtain a second opinion” I replied.

“Can his Parkinson’s be the side effect of the knee surgery done eight years ago?” She.

“No” me.

I now issued a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order for my gasping patience.

Most doctors know the simplified versions of how to explain the patient in layman language about the common diseases/ disorders. Every type of case requires a lot of reading and actual handling / treating to gain insights about that condition, something that is impossible to explain exactly to the patient / relative, especially because they do not know the basic concepts, organs, their functions etc. What even the brilliant medical students take repeated readings and many case studies to understand well, cannot be simplified enough to explain to all and sundry.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Add to this: every patient even with the same diagnosis is different, needs an individualised approach, and no google guidelines or statistics can replace the doctor’s wisdom in making a treatment decision especially in complicated cases. To make the most accurate decision and to explain it is a doctor’s duty, but the understanding quotient of the patient or relative cannot be the doctor’s responsibility. Medicine is so complicated, that even the most experienced doctor in the world cannot say he knows everything about any single medical condition.

The more you attempt to educate some literates, the deeper in a quicksand you enter. Because they are not satisfied with the fact that the doctor is making the best effort to educate, but look upon this as an opportunity to question the knowledge and wisdom of the very expert whose opinion they are there to seek!

They try and catch words and cross question as if it is a legal argument.

“You said swelling: show me where is the swelling?” most common question.

“Well, it is called Inflammation in medical language, there is no accurate translation for that word even in Hindi, hence we commonly use the word swelling. It may not be a visible swelling”.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

It is not always the fault of doctor’s ability to communicate, it is often the over-expectation that one can understand everything. It is laughable that even those some whose life is a mess, who are failures in their own chosen paths try and argue about medical diagnosis and decisions with highly qualified doctors.

However profound a doctor I may think I am, there are so many things I do not understand: politics, finances, many people’s behaviour, mathematics, government, etc., and I am ok without ith not understanding most. However I do not have the audacity to ask an expert in these fields / professor / CA whether he / she has enough experience.

But with a doctor, these liberties are becoming rampant now.

“I think he has convulsions because of his spondylosis” one halfpant+crocs combo tried to punch a new hole in my knowledge recently.

“Let me decide that” was all I replied, rather than explaining how he was beyond wrong.

The shorter you keep it, the sweeter it remains. I would rather save and use my time for those worried, panicked patients who have enough faith in my abilities, who understand mutual respect, and who will have at least this insight: that the doctor knows best how to treat patients.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Of course I am aware that there are some doctors too, who initiate rude conversations, do not respect simple etiquettes, and are quite difficult to connect to. Most patients even when offended by rude doctors, kindly choose not to react although they carry home a bitter feeling. Every medical student, every doctor must be taught in the earliest parts of internship about the code of etiquette and mutual respect while dealing with any patient, and only then expect the patient to follow it too.

Coming back to this lady, I wrapped up the session by telling them to follow up after a month.

“Can he continue to take his three large pegs of rum every night? He cannot sleep otherwise” she asked.

“In my 25 years of practice, I haven’t met anyone whose health improved with alcohol. Do please google that.” I gave her the dose she had begged for.

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

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Doctor’s Fees: A Taboo Topic

Doctor’s Fees: A Taboo Topic
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
A famous industrialist from Pune recently visited my OPD. My Boss called me on phone and told me to waive off the fees, as he was a close friend of my Boss. The industrialist was not only well behaved, but well-read too. He had a complicated problem, had seen Neurologists etc. in India and UK. He asked many questions, and I was happy to have been able to reply to most. The consultation lasted over 45 minutes. He went out, and was told by the receptionist that his fees was waived off. He knocked my door, came back in, and placed three thousand rupees on my table. My usual fees is half that.
“Doc, I don’t believe in taking advantage. You gave me all the time I needed, and I have paid far more to the foreign doctors for a fraction of that time” he said.
 
Just a few days prior, a European patient from Mumbai had visited with her Indian in-laws, and after a detailed consultation, when they went out and paid the usual fees of 1500 INR, she messaged me: that this was far lower for the service they received. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Two days ago, on Saturday night at 9 PM, one lady rushed in without appointment, an engineer now working in Pune. Quite lavish in her get up and paraphernalia, she told me she had recently delivered a baby in the USA and then returned to India. After we finished the consultation that lasted over 30 minutes, and included many questions and explanations about her “minor” neurological problem, about justification of diagnosis, every medicine, about lactation, and about her prior medical consultations, I was happy that I had answered all her questions, and was able to treat her without any tests. Then she said: “And yes, doc, your fees is too high. Most doctors in my area charge less than that. I want concession”.
 
Earlier it was quite embarrassing for me to discuss money with patients. I felt it was below my dignity to have to talk about money, and humiliating to have to explain my fees. When I decided what I charged, it was after a prolonged thought process, and awareness of Indian healthcare scenario and socioeconomic conditions. While being available for genuinely poor patients, I did not want to resort to any backdoor incomes, and also wanted to give every patient the best of my skill acquired over 15 years of education, and enough time. There are clean doctors, far more senior than me, in my branch, who know this well and charge a lot more as consultation fees than I do (some over 5000 INR for a single consult), for they know their own worth. But there also are few who for their own reasons continue to charge far lesser, some with a noble intention (usually at the fag end of their career), some with alternative plans. It is a personal preference of the doctor, especially specialist. A correct diagnosis and honest /right advise is becoming rare and rare, what with the quality of medical education and an admixture of streams, which aim at the fast, cheap, objective and basic rather than specialized, subjective and accurate. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
In absence of any comparable example, (medical service is not comparable to any other, but to quote an example that most should understand), I have to mention this: when one buys land, home, good food or technology, one pays differently at different places, for different brands. No one argues about the rates of foreign cellphones or jewelry, even about cinema tickets, but the most important service of all: health, is considered a bargainable, perpetually low cost charity. Basic and emergency healthcare doesn’t mean attached super-technology, five star rooms and washrooms and air conditioning, best qualified staff and ancillary services. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Used to this question very frequently, I told this lady that my fees was the same as that of most super-specialists in larger cities, that it was based upon qualification, experience, skill and time spent. She wouldn’t listen, and refused to pay. I told her she could avail of the free OPD meant for poor patients if she had a BPL card or if she was a farmer. “I can afford, I am not poor. But I want concession, because some doctors in my area charge only XXX”she said. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
A senior doctor had advised me during the beginning of my practice: “Concentrate on the affordability of the middle class. Manage your time with the patient according to their affordability, people are rarely willing to pay the doctor. If your consultation fees is high, you will turn off many patients, because even the rich opt for the cheapest possible healthcare, including the doctor”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Of course I did not want to discriminate. But over a period of time I realized that most of the forced free categories keep on repeatedly visiting various specialists / hospitals (a free category patient visits over three consultants for every medical issue) because it is free/ low cost, this is a frustrating scenario. Even the affording class visits many specialists for the same problem because the doctor’s fees is too ‘affordable’.
 
A doctor must always be kind and compassionate, but in India, he / she also needs to be practical to avoid being exploited. Compare to the availability of a free food service at your home for the poor. Check out for yourself how many misuse it, and how often. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Various pathies and specialties have a different fees structure, and people must be educated that all doctors cannot charge the same. A surgeon or physician with more skill, experience, expertise and good outcomes is definitely entitled to charge more than his peers. After all, what is a few thousand rupees when one’s health is concerned? When filing suits against doctors who commit mistakes, people claim in crores, a fact that must be accounted for when the doctor charges his / her fees.
 
“Your fees has increased” said a patient, who has paid the same fees for last 8 years. When I asked him to name any commodity whose price hasn’t increased in last eight years, he said “But you are a doctor”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Among all the inflations happening everywhere, it is only the doctor’s fees that mostly remains unchanged for years. There are excellent charity institutes with great healthcare services , also many government hospitals, but most people want a “Premium / Priority” healthcare service at their lowest rates, refusing to stand in a queue at such hospitals. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
The cut throat competition among hospitals to match society’s low cost healthcare expectations has resulted in a nightmare: most of the permanent staff being hired is low-salary, low qualification overworked, and exploited, many of the consumables used are of a questionable quality. This reflects worst in most critical care units and some surgical units. Very few will understand the true depth of this horrible tragedy.
 
While all cut-practice and other malpractices must end, while every doctor must compassionately aim at resolving the health problem that the patient trusts him / her with, and satisfy the patient as much as possible, it is also necessary that people understand that good healthcare will come at a higher cost. No doctor should refuse emergency /basic treatment to a patient who really cannot afford. Other than this, “Cheaper Doctors are the kindest and the best” is a devastating superstition we must eradicate.
 
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
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G-Bhai, The Suicidal Intellect.

G-Bhai, The Suicidal Intellect.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
G-Bhai is an extraordinary genius, and all that he lacks in the matter of manners, culture, and grooming oneself to a neat and clean appearance is compensated for by his superb analytical abilities and internet access. He was so engrossed in Google all the time, that he was nicknamed G-Bhai by his family.
 
A few weeks ago, he went to his boss, who owned one of the biggest profitmaking multinationals upon earth. The boss was absorbed in his divine meditation about new tricks to lay off more IT personnel in pursuit of that greatest human achievement in today’s world: moolah. G-Bhai, who believed in complete equality, sat cross legged in front of his boss, and scratching his beard, told his boss where all the boss and the company could improve. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
The boss, amused by free entertainment, asked G-Bhai where he learnt it all.
“Internet” said G-Bhai, and showed some Googled statistics to his boss.
“Thank you, you are fired with immediate effect” said the boss
.
G-Bhai wasn’t affected at all. With his oversized grey T shirt, jeans, slippers and laptop that connected him to all the internet data, he was still the king.
 
He thought of adventure, and went to the Indo-Pak border. The firing and shelling was full-on. He met an Indian soldier who asked him to hide in his shelter. The soldier, who had spent all his life upon the border, was prepared to even die for this citizen, so gave away his helmet to G-Bhai.
G-Bhai was intensely searching the internet, wearing the soldier’s helmet.
“Don’t fire the gun like that” told G-Bhai to the soldier. “This website says the right way to fire is with the gun aimed at oneself”. The soldier ignored him and continued to defend the border. Just as he held a hand grenade to be thrown, G-Bhai held his hand. “Let me search first if you are doing it correctly” he said. The soldier, now in defense of his own life risked, slapped G-Bhai tight and asked him not to interfere. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
G-Bhai proceeded to write a very critical review of that soldier, saying that in his opinion, all the soldiers were doing it all wrong.
 
Then he went to the court and tried to teach the lawyers how to argue, and the Judges how to analyse cases and deliver judgments. He showed them multiple websites from which they could learn law. “We are all equals, why are you sitting so high?” he asked the judges and tried to sit on the Judge’s chair.
After six months in jail, upon his release, G-Bhai went to the police commissioner to teach her how to deal with crime and criminals, based upon internet searches from different countries. He came out limping, and refused to tell anyone why. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Due to excess stress, his health worsened. He went to the best of the doctors. He demanded that he wanted a complete check up to reach the most correct diagnosis. He was advised tests. He researched the internet and did only the tests he thought were necessary, because he thought all doctors were corrupt. He reached a very reputed doctor with the test results. The 70 year old doctor examined him, checked the reports and told him: “You are a failure in your own life, you have excess stress, and are unable to handle it. You are jealous of everyone who is doing well, and therefore you have developed a complex that everyone who does well is either corrupt or wrong. Go home, exercise, find your own life and deal with yourself” When he tried to show the experienced doctor what internet said, the doctor smiled and asked “Did you also net-teach your parents how to make you?”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
G-Bhai then went to many doctors in many pathies. Then he researched and tried many home remedies. But his health kept on worsening. He was very upset and started a blog of criticizing that all the doctors. Here, for the first time in life, he discovered success: he was an instant hit, because there was a huge population who agreed with his views. There are more buyers for poison than for wisdom in this world.
 
But unfortunately by then, his kidneys failed due to experimentation with various medicines and various pathies. Now he is undergoing dialysis and posts his anti-doctor articles from the dialysis ward. The old doctor recently visited him with his flock of medical students, and spoke with empathy to the bitter G-bhai, who tried to show the old doctor some more internet references about his treatment.
 
The old doctor then told his students: “This is what I would call a suicidal intellect”.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
 
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My Earning As A Doctor

My Earning As A Doctor
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
It was an emergency night, and we were trying to cope up with the excessive load that every government hospital must accommodate. One of my early postgraduate emergencies. The living, the dead and those in between were being rushed in continuously, and we were dealing with the emotional ups and downs at an almost impossible pace. In the same moment we were Gods and heroes for some, and devilish villains for others.
 
Nature, age, illness, delays, illiteracy and poverty are easy to fight with sometimes, but not what people expect from a doctor.
 
I was writing on the ward desk, filling up the necessary paperwork, an irritating interruption in a clinician’s life. Trying to recall something, I stared for a moment at the long stretch of that huge ward. My senior resident Dr. Sunil was performing a procedure called pleural tap, where fluid is removed from the chest. He was from a very poor and rural background, but had excellent merit. Most people made fun of his looks and language, that made him silent and aloof. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
An old man came out of the toilet, accompanied with his wife. He was about 80, was admitted and had recovered from a stroke. He was scheduled to be discharged next morning.
While walking to his bed, this old man suddenly collapsed, his wife unable to hold him. He was about 10 metres away from me. Sunil and myself reached there immediately, shouting for the crash cart, and started resuscitation. We tried for many minutes, as the patient’s wife stood a few metres away, sobbing.
 
He was dead. He had had a sudden cardiac arrest.
It was the third death in the ward that day, among the thirty emergencies admitted.
 
Dr. Sunil went to the patient’s wife. and informed her. He got her some water, and sat with her for some time. Then when he resumed the paperwork, I noticed he was feeling sad and tearful too, like myself. The old man and his wife had both been so nice to us. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
Only a doctor knows the traumatic feelings of having to resuscitate someone who was talking to them a few moments ago. Believe it or not, almost every death certificate makes a scar on a sensitive doctor’s mind. The trauma is perpetual, hidden, but also real.
 
As we arranged for their transport (the couple had no relatives and were from a nearby village), the old lady sat by her husband, touching his face and crying. When she left, she said “God bless you, you people still tried so much. We are both old, what can you do! This is my destiny. I hope God takes me up quickly too, I have no purpose in life now”.
 
Sunil went to the doctor’s room and broke down. This was unusual. I tried to console him, myself feeling very sad. Then, Sunil looked out of the window and said in a heavy voice: “My mother died exactly like this, in a hospital ward, when I was a child. I was with her. That is when I decided to become a doctor and save lives. At such times I feel very hopeless”.
 
“Oh”, I said, not knowing how to react, “Where is your father now?”
“He passed away long before my mother, he had fever, but they did not have money to take him to a hospital. He died at home.” Said Dr. Sunil.
In some time, we went for a tea and composed ourselves again. The night was to bring many more who needed us stable, so we returned in few minutes.
 
The next day, we presented to our professor the forty two cases admitted in emergency, a usual count at most medicine emergencies. Going home after over 36 hours, I could not eat that day. A doctor should not be too emotional, but then no one makes themselves, one can only control reactions. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
Fast forward to the future: my father, one afternoon at home, collapsed suddenly and was taken to the nearest hospital three minutes away, but could not be resuscitated. I was in Mumbai, far away from him. That phone call still rings in my ears. Sometimes I have to sit down at the memory of that call, it breaks me.
 
I did not curse that doctor to whom my dad was taken. I did not blame anyone. I did not go to the press or police. I did not think that the doctor was wrong or was working for money when someone was dying. It is impossible. One who thinks that a doctor will think of money in the face of a dying patient is probably also the one who never fully believed in God, and also questioned their own mother’s love for themselves!
 
Like almost every sensitive doctor, like Dr. Sunil, the only way for me to forget the agony of losing my dear ones was to prevent this from happening in anyone else’s life.
 
So what if most of them think I worked for money, so what if they refuse to ever acknowledge gratitude in words or in deed. So what if they only look at the money I earn through my hard work.
 
My real earning, like that of every sensible doctor, is the reduced burden of suffering in the human world. The tax I pay is my blood and sweat. Those who do not use these currencies will never know their value.
 
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
 
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The Music Called Life

The Music Called Life
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“What prize do you want”? My father asked me after I finished my tenth standard exams well.

I was desperately awaiting that question, knowing him well.

“A Sony Walkman” I replied almost instantly. I got one, the most basic Sony model, and lost myself for weeks in the stereophonic effects, collecting songs and recordings that had best quality. Right from the scratchy sound at the beginning, made by the record player needle-tip on the record disc, to the realization of different soundtracks on right and left, with separate sounds of each instrument. One favorite hobby was to select and follow only one instrument from the whole orchestra throughout the song.

Besides the music of MJ, Madonna, Beatles, the Indian stereo effect songs were a pleasure too. Ye bambai shehar haadson ka shehar hai (Kalyanji Anandji) and Pag Ghungroo Baandh, Thodi si jo pee lee hai (Bappi Lahiri) had the best stereo effects from the headphone. Kishore Kumar, Lataji, Lionel Richie, Cliff Richard, and Bee Gees became addictions. The collection grew enormously.

A cousin returning from the USA bought himself a Bose audio system, I was 18 then. I remember arranging the exact angles of the speakers, all directed towards one single chair at the center of the room, then taking turns to listen to “How Soon Is Now” (The Smiths). The strong wish that I must own the best music system for myself, make a music room in my home dawned that day, and is still thriving within me.

Much later, on a birthday, returning after ward work, I found a huge parcel at my hostel door, and the watchman told me that a fan had left it there. I had told some friends how I loved “Experiencing music”. Opening the box, I found the most advanced 8 speaker Panasonic music system, the home theatre one. That was one of the best gifts I ever received. The effectiveness of listening to music as a treatment for one’s negative moods is beyond question. I feel that good singers , those healers of soul, are better doctors than many medical degree holders,as their love songs and happy songs cure many a sad minds. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Recently when I listened to great music all the night with a very precious friend, a beautiful soul who understands that each instrument and even the voice of the singer has a different expression, other than the lyrics, who can feel music imprinted upon blood just as I do, I realized what I was missing in life. With this friend, the hear beats of life have become stereophonically audible again to me!

Technology has started drowning music into sounds, taking out meaning to be replaced by sound effects, we have almost lost the appreciation of the intricate fineries of meaningful music. The true feeling of listening to music is much like being underwater, if at all to compare: unless you drown yourself in it, you don’t feel it right!

Talking to patients, students, colleagues, this thought grew into a major revelation: we are losing our fineries not only about music, but also about feeling out other people: near and dear ones as much as strangers, both can have so much more meaning than the “bodies and words” that men and women have become now! There’s so much beauty in almost every human being who dares to preserve individuality without either copying anything or looking down upon anyone else.

An alert, feeling, self-aware mind that dwells upon the here and now is the best song nature has ever sung to me: and also the highest state a human mind can achieve. Unfortunately, we are lost in the digital-technology jungle, and take pride in either losing ourselves, escaping or running away from ourselves, or searching ourselves outside our own conscious reality. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

I have decided for now: that I want to live this music experience without compromising: I want to to feel every bit and piece of the music that life brings to me, through songs and their lyrics, through the rains and the sun, through eyes, touch and silence, and above all, the resonance that it generates within me.

Only Love can match the beauty of good Music.

For the music called life is never sad, and I want to always walk towards a happy inner peace.

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Do you want a broken leg, Doctor?”

“Do you want a broken leg, Doctor?”
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Three days after he suffered a paralysis, after having tried Voo Doo, Herbal and some other medicines, an old man of 80 was shifted to a big private hospital once he became comatose. The three sons accompanying him didn’t even touch the comatose patient, they didn’t even care about whether he was covered properly or not.
His Blood Pressure was too high, and he turned out to have a bleeding in the brain, untreated till this moment. His brain was swollen badly.

Every private hospital has free mandatory beds for poor patients. This family was asked about their preference and eligibility. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande
“We will pay everything. Don’t worry about the money. He should get the best room and facilities” his son said. They signed the necessary documents about knowing the critical condition of the patient, charging schedules, willingness to pay etc.
Then the sons came to me and said “We don’t care about the money, doctor, but he should get completely cured”.
This was expected, experience teaches a doctor about relatives as much as about patients.
“He is 80 years old and critical. At this stage I cannot guarantee anything. Complete recovery looks impossible, partial recovery may be hoped for if he responds well to standard treatment” I replied.
“But we will pay anything you want” the younger son said.
I involved the PRO, a lady who had far better patience than myself dealing with attitude and arrogance. Explained them once again, and left after the patient was shifted to our Neuro Intensive Care Unit. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The patient improved in five days. Started to speak a few relevant words. Out of danger, shifted to Deluxe Room as requested. The only person who ever attended the patient was a 15 year old grandson, mostly the patient was left alone.
The sons had by then submitted some documents claiming a BPL “Below Poverty Line” status, but those were found to be false. A fake letter in the name of charity commissioner was also attempted. The hospital PRO reminded the patient’s sons about the pending bills regularly.

It became clear that none of the three sons who earned well themselves wanted to pay for their father’s treatment. They had continuous fights amongst themselves, the only thing they agreed upon was not wanting their father. The request “He must get completely cured” was not because they wanted his health, but because no one wanted to take home a disabled father to care for years.

The hospital took a stern stand. The bills had exceeded two lacs rupees, nothing was paid. This indeed was burglary with blackmail.

After repeatedly asking to meet the patient’s sons for another three days who did not pick up the hospital calls, I told the attending boy very carefully to please remind his parents to settle the pending bills, also reminding him that nothing in the treatment will wait or change because of bills.

In two hours I received a call. It was a local Municipal Councilor.
“Doctor, do you want a broken leg? Are you a doctor or a businessman? How can you speak about money to a small boy? Just keep on treating. We will do something about the bills through our MLA. If you speak about bills again, remember, there will be news about your hospital on every channel”.

Do I have time, energy to waste, filing a police complaint? Will it be any use at all? © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

In no other industry, not even in govt. offices, will anyone be given anything on credit: even for a paper worth five rupees. Even the poorest of the poor cannot get free food or travel in private industry. But the entire private medical care is expected to go on working in ‘credit’ mode, for everyone who claims to be poor. Emergency is understood, and no hospital or doctor thinks about money in case of emergency. But once emergency is over, those who cannot afford a private hospital should go to a government hospital. A private hospital needs too much investment per bed, and anyone who questions this can please sponsor one bed in any ICU for a poor patient, see for themselves what the actuals cost.

Who will even address this Burglary and Blackmail that happens everyday in every private hospital in India?

There should be an online portal by government / police for doctors and hospitals to report patients dumped by family, families who refuse to pay, those who use threats and intimidation anonymously. Then the ‘other side’ of this story will be clear.

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Worse than Death

Worse than Death
(C) Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Doctor, I have started to die. Can you help me somehow?” he asked, calmly.
In his late twenties, a handsome young man, well dressed, but with a certain painful gloom upon his face that was a mismatch to an overall nice and clean appearance. What could this be? I started thinking, hoping he was wrong.

Then his shoulder twitched, and arm had a slight jerk. A pang of suspicion bit my heart immediately. He confirmed it in few seconds. Those who take life for granted are often so full of anxiety, and here he was, who had initiated a countdown to his own death, talking to me in a low but clear voice.
“Doctor, I have been diagnosed with Huntington’s disease over 7 years ago” he said, “Till now I had only these jerky movements. Now I have started having some mood problems and also memory issues. My parents died in an accident when I was three. My uncle’s family cared for me till I could go to a boarding school. I stay alone in a rental apartment, I work in an IT company”.

Examination and review of reports established that his diagnosis was correct. There is no treatment.
This illness of brain degeneration starts with abnormal movements, then causes loss of memory and other cognitive functions, mood swings, depression, finally causing complete immobility and usually death ensues due to blockage of windpipe because of food while swallowing. A patient usually survives less than 13-18 years after the diagnosis. Some commit suicide.

What do I tell someone aged 28 who knows he will definitely die soon?
Yes there are research options and support groups. Yes I can send him to a professional counsellor. Yes I can use some mood stabilising medicines and antidepressants.
But can I emotionally detach from this event as a doctor? (C) Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Diagnose and treat with empathy, educate and move on. Don’t take home the burden of your patient’s illness. Don’t get emotionally involved in your patient’s lives and problems. Never. But is that possible?

Shall I ask him if he has any bucket list of things he wants to once experience, before he forgets who he is? Is there something there that I can help him with? Has he planned anything about his life when he is mentally or physically disabled?

I told him that some medicines can help him, and wrote a prescription. Also referred him to an expert counsellor.

What would I do in such a situation? What is it that I would like to hear from the doctor, knowing the obvious too? What is so important in life when one knows that there are only a few years remaining?

Those who have the luxury of ignorance can laugh and superficially answer. Those who answer immediately have seldom used thinking. Those who are assured of their health have changing answers.
But those who know it?

I decided to ask him. (C) Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Next time he visited, he told me that he has resigned from his job, as he had problems dealing with the responsibility. He could not ride his two wheeler too, he had sold it off.

“I am going to my ancestral village, doctor. A dharamshala (religious sanctuary) has agreed to allow me stay and food, and help me as much as they can. I am also willing to donate my body for research, so at least others don’t suffer this. But I have to finalise yet”.

In India, just as there is no scope for genuine research, there also is complete lack of any infrastructure for the care of such patients.

I decided to ask him what troubled me.
“Is there something you wanted to do?” I could not bring myself to say “before you go”.

He tried to smile. His eyes welled up as he thought about the question.
“Yes, Doctor. I wanted to feel someone loving me madly at least once. In fact I had a girl in my office whom I liked. I think she liked me too. But then my diagnosis was confirmed and I didn’t want her to suffer, so I never told her. I met her before resigning, and told her the truth”.

“Everyone will only degenerate,” he continued, “I am ready to see myself degenerate early. But the one purpose, the one good memory of life that one can wrap himself with when facing the decline, is love. Everything else only reminds of loss”.Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Then, wiping his tears and sobbing, for once, openly, without the restriction of pride, he held my hand, and said, “Thank you doctor for all your help. I came to know just now, that not having loved is what I regret most. It feels worse than death. Even if I had felt true love once, I won’t have regretted this early death”.

He had only echoed what every particle, every corner and every breath of life always reminds us of, while we keep on searching for everything else.
Dr. Rajas Deshpande