Category Archives: MS

The Higher Suffering

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Stuck in the heavy traffic due to rains, I tried to remain calm. The cellphone kept on ringing, patients who were waiting, those who wanted appointments, those who were to catch their ride out of station anxiously asked when will I reach. Some lost patience and raised voice. In addition, there were calls about the patients admitted in the hospital: critical decisions to be made, idiotic questions by insurance companies to be replied to. There were huge processions, the traffic was diverted, without any arrangements for ambulances. Impatient, aggressive and violent people is a reality on almost all Indian roads now. No one cares for law on the road. You are at the mercy of anyone who chooses to pick up a fight with you.

There were some issues at home too, the cook had called in sick, we had to do some emergency cooking. That had delayed my start.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

At last, an hour late, I reached the OPD, and entered running. Faces with controlled anger greeted with cultured politeness. Prepared for bitter comments, I called in the first patient.

This was a free patient, she did not need a follow up. But being free, she visits almost religiously every month, whenever she has a fight with her husband. Sometimes, when the only guaranteed compassion is from a doctor, it can be misused. However, as I was late, I decided to respect their patience, and told them to visit a counselor. Nevertheless, my irritation heightened, that this added to the wait of other patients.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

I certainly am impatient with meaningless waste of time, and sometimes the traffic, the sudden changes in schedules due to someone’s irresponsible behavior, and misuse of compassionate services bring me to the edge of a reaction. This was one such moment. My face must have become grim.

The next patient walked in, an elderly gentleman with Parkinson’s disease. He was accompanied by his wife. They were supposed to come back three months later, but had followed up early. I examined him, found him quite stable neurologically, but the usual twinkle in his eyes was absent. Even his usually smiling wife appeared lost. It must be the traffic, my late arrival or something likewise, I thought, and curbed my curiosity to ask them. Today was heavy and behind schedule, I must wind up fast. Yet, as I explained them that everything was stable and alright, that they need not worry, I noticed the unspoken uneasiness in their body language. A little reluctantly but keeping up with the expectation of my own heart, I asked them: “You look quite disturbed and stressed. Is anything the matter? I am sorry I came late today”.

“No, no doctor, it’s not that. But yes, he is stressed and disturbed said the wife, and looked inquisitively towards her husband. ”Shall I tell him?” she asked.

Looking down, hiding his face, the husband nodded.

“Doctor, we lost our only son ten only days ago. Someone killed him on the road. Some drunk goons dashed his car from behind, and when he got down to check the damage, they attacked him and hit him on the head with some rods. He was lying on the road for a long time, and by the time police took him to the hospital, he was gone. We came to know after a few hours. He was our only child, an engineering scholar who had returned to India with great dreams .”

The lady was silently weeping as she kept her emotions in control. The patient was sobbing, I called the receptionist to get a glass of water.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“We have done so much for our town and the society” said the patient, “but now I feel it was all useless. No one is safe even on the roads. We see so many rules and laws broken, so many violent and aggressive people that it has become difficult to question anyone even when they misbehave”.

I had no words to pacify them. What can pacify the parents of a dead child, that too a victim lawlessness?

The receptionist called “Sir, the next patient is shouting” she said.

“Five minutes” I requested her.

“You are busy, doc, we will leave. But I brought him here only because he feels better when he meets you. Once you reassure him, he will feel a little secure. Even I feel better when I see you. Otherwise we sit at home just staring at each other’s sunken souls. We have no relatives”.

That was a bitter eye opener to me. They had chosen me to be their lifeline in the worst times of their life, and here I was, thinking about my worries, my time, and the inevitable small happenings that block the path of every working person every day. I had momentarily ignored the fact that I must still enter the hospital with a smile, push behind myself all the negatives that pull me down. For every patient here to see me comes with a hundred fears and a thousand expectations, the least I can do for them is be compassionate and reassuring, whatever may have happened till that moment.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“You may see many patients in a day and listen to their troubles, doc, but you are the only doctor your patient meets in a long time. I don’t know about you, but we always feel good when we see you”. The wife added.

Yes, I had heard that earlier, in my teacher’s cabin. Once a patient develops trust in his / her doctor, they look upon the doctor as one of the most reliable resource for courage, compassion and troubleshooting, even beyond the expertise of that doctor. As doctors, we must never forget this, and stand up tall above all our personal problems to be the supermen and superwomen, the Messiahs, the Saviors that we are expected to be. Law and some idiots do push a stick in our wheels, but then the patient is far above both. A patient’s suffering is always far above that of any doctor.

I stood up, held the patient’s hand, and reassured them: that they do have a relative here in Pune. “According to the Pune tradition”, I said, “one should offer tea only when the guests are half out of the door, but I will make an exception today .”

Having them sit in the next empty room, I proceeded with the OPD. Ordering tea for everyone in the OPD waiting room, I stole a few more minutes to calm the ruffled souls of those two, and asked them to see me again, whenever they wished.

As I returned late after dark, even through the rainy night, a sweet moonlight made the raindrops glow. Just like every doctor brings back the smiles to the burning hearts of their patients!

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Why Don’t You Marry Her, Doc?”

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Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Sir, she cannot walk, she is paralysed below chest since last few days. Her husband doesn’t care, he has abandoned her. She has no money or insurance for tests or treatment. I want to help her, I don’t know what to do” I told my junior consultant, who was having his coffee break with senior consultant and the departmental secretaries. He looked at me in a nasty way, and said “Why don’t you marry her?” and they all laughed aloud. However, although my professor smiled with them, he asked me to get the patient’s papers.

She was a case of Multiple Sclerosis, in her early thirties, and had lost ability to walk. Her sensation below the waist, control over urine was also lost. This ghastly illness of the brain and spine often cripples the young. In many cases, when such disability develops, divorces follow. The world as we doctors see it is far more cruel, deceptive and dangerous than most illnesses humanity knows. She was left with a small daughter and no income. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

I felt insulted, but I was in a foreign country. The junior consultant was known for his sarcastic humour and enjoyed impressing women around him, often at the cost of others, like so many dwarfs who take advantage of their chair to achieve what they otherwise cannot. I chose to ignore him, and got the papers to our boss, who called a colleague to enrol the patient in one of the upcoming research trials. That would ensure her free tests and medicines for a few years. I told her the good news. She started sobbing, then handed me a note written by her:
“I am killing myself as I have nothing left except my daughter, I cannot look after her with my disability. I have no complaints against anyone. Please look after my daughter”.
In some time, after she stabilised, she said “Doc, I had come prepared to kill myself today. My daughter is sitting in the cafeteria. If you had not told me what you did just now, believe me, I was planning to drive my wheelchair off the roof today”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

We called her 10 year old daughter from the cafeteria. Little did the cute child know how lucky she was to see her mother again that day.

That evening, my boss, the senior consultant, took me out for a dinner. Once the red wine loosened strained faces, he started to speak: “Rajaas, I know you are kind and you want to help others. I know you feel for your patients. But I must caution you, don’t get carried away. Your job is clear: to listen, to advise the best line of investigations and treatment, to explain, and to compassionately guide. Don’t carry too much weight upon your shoulders”.
“Why, Sir?”I asked politely, “I feel inner peace when I walk an extra mile to help my patient. How can that cause me any harm? Didn’t this lady survive just because you helped her today?”
“Because it is a never ending burden. To be able to effectively help everyone coming to you, you must have too much money and too much time. Doctors seldom have either. I lost a lot of time and money, to realise that this cycle never ends, that newer and more people need your help every day, all your life. I almost went bankrupt, collapsed and quit under stress. Then I realised that I must limit this so I could serve them best the next day”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

It felt like dry reasoning at that moment. However, boss continued to help patients beyond duty whenever I asked him. Over years, I realised how correct Boss was!

My dear british colleague Dr. Mindy was trying to help a patient through her divorce, I accompanied her. As the patient opened up, she revealed to Mindy that although she enjoyed marijuana, her husband was involved in the sale of other illicit drugs, and that was one reason that she wanted to divorce him. Dr. Mindy involved a counsellor to help her out. However, after they decided to patch up their marriage, the patient told her husband that she had confided in Dr. Mindy. The husband came over and politely threatened her to keep all the information only to herself, otherwise be prepared for dare consequences.
We all spent many a restless nights after that.

Emotionally disturbed, helpless patients, those who are treated unfair by family often depend upon a kind doctor. They get quite restless at times, worry a lot and then expect an immediate hearing and resolution from their doctor. From suicide threats to blackmails, there are messages that pour in once that channel is opened. This sometimes wreaks havoc in the doctor‘s life, because being disturbed affects clinical practice and decision making. The small time left for self and family is thus shot dead. A patient who becomes emotionally dependent upon the doctor can turn into a nightmare for the doctor. Over years, I learnt to balance this, going out of the way only for the few truly deserving patients.

Thousands of patients have survived just because their doctor emotionally supported them in time, otherwise they would have died of lack of will to carry on. No one ever credits the doctors who become emotional back-ups for their patients: a service that costs them time and stress, without any income. That is unfortunately considered a “duty” of the doctor, to be kind and available at bad times, but to be forgotten in good times. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande. Many actually think that good words, compliments and “a satisfaction of serving” should be sufficient compensation for the doctor. Nothing fully compensates, although kind words do sometimes make one feel good.

However, what caused worse hurt to me was some of my own colleagues who made fun of me and many other doctors who went out of their way to help patients. “Impractical, unnecessary, worthless, drama”, and so many other adjectives are used by colleagues and even seniors/ some teachers for doctors, students, residents who walk an extra mile to help their patients. I was extremely fortunate that I met some good teachers who supported my efforts without mocking me, and I continue to meet students who carry on this noble trait forwards.

When I was leaving, the junior consultant came over for the farewell too, and told me in too many words how I must learn to be “Practical”. I gave him a reply that one teacher with advanced genius had taught me years ago, for people who do less themselves and advise others a lot. This reply saves a lot of time and energy, my teacher had told me, and its beauty is that people don’t even understand that you are saying ‘those two useful words’ when you reply like this:

I just smiled at him.

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

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Ban the Entire Medical Profession!

Ban the Entire Medical Profession!
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

We were always much entertained by a very famous surgeon who would just sit all dressed up in the operation theater. As the worried relatives kept praying in the waiting room, the patient was operated by some other experienced and skilled doctors employed by this ‘famous’ doctor. He would just sit watching TV in his private room within the operation theater, till the surgery was over. Then, he would come out with a benevolent smile, pretend that he was too exhausted, and tell the relatives “that was an extraordinary case. We had almost lost your patient. I had to make a great effort, use all my dedication, knowledge and experience, but finally I could save him. You are very lucky”. Needless to say, the relatives would touch his feet, overwhelmed by emotion, little knowing that this surgeon has not even touched their patient. Bills floated swollen. The patient or the relatives never knew who actually saved that life. In our education to be doctors, we also learnt “what not to do” from such doctors!

With a recent speech in London, I was reminded of this.
It was very unfortunate that the Hon’ble Prime Minister of our own country spoke quite demeaning about the entire Indian medical profession in a foreign country. Nearly one third doctors in the developed world are from India, leaving India because it offers them no good opportunity, compensation or even basic security. The PM seems to disown the patriotic doctors who try to survive in and serve India. Where is the love for India? Does one demonstrate it by showing everyone else in the country down?© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Let me at the outset clarify that there are some corrupt doctors, some get favours from pharma, and some participate in malpractice. The government always had rights and law in their hand to act against such doctors. The hubs of corruption evolve when the government allows medical seats to be bought for the meritless rich. Our govt. allows crores of sales of medical seats.

We wish our PM also spoke about how many political leaders in this country own medical colleges and what is the actual income that they generate by sales of UG / PG medical seats? Like the prices of all drugs and stents, why not reduce the price of medical seats too?

He said that Indian doctors “do not travel to Singapore to see poor patients”. Was he serving the poor Indian farmers in London? How many poor farmers or labourers accompanied the PM or his delegations on any of his foreign trips? For a PM who has extensively travelled the world, to criticise highly educated doctors for traveling abroad is so unbecoming! Doctors interact with experts from other countries for learning, continuing medical education, and just because Indian politics has screwed the nation into poverty, doctors cannot stop that interaction which is a standard learning process all the world over. Just as Indian politicians who go abroad for treatment to Singapore and London etc. don’t go there to have fun, doctors too do not go for just fun but for a grand purpose: to bring in new knowledge and skills to Indian people.

Then he said that he “enquired” about stents and found that doctors were “”duping” / deceiving all patients into buying costly stents. The PM has himself said in many speeches that he is not educated much, any medical discussion needs high standards of education, scientific proofs and statistics. I am sure that the right people / departments / doctors were consulted by the PM before taking such decisions. Why did he then say “I found out and changed this” rather than “our medical experts / team did this” ? Under the privacy laws no one will know what stents go into which class of people, but from what the doctors see, most politicians and high placed officers opt for “the best and imported”. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

We wish that the PM, on his next foreign trip on an international platform, also speaks about the state of the government-run hospitals, the federal funding for healthcare, the quality of healthcare provided at rural and primary healthcare centers all across India, the gross inadequacy of staff and the absence of specialists, ICUs, Operation Theatres, in almost all government-run hospitals.

We also wish the PM speaks on an international platform about the state of hostels for undergraduate and postgraduate medical students in India, where they have to live about 4-6 people in a small single room, while the huge luxurious premises for various govt. officers and ministers lie vacant most of the time.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

We wish the PM also speaks about the good doctors (all his recent speeches imply that there are no good doctors in India), extraordinary medical achievements of Indian doctors, about those who serve in rural India while facing humungous difficulties, those who bring medical tourism to India, those who run so many charity hospitals, those who bring world class healthcare to Indian patients, those grassroot doctors and paramedics who effectively carry out the govt’s schemes all year round by hard work, including polio and other vaccinations, mother-child care etc. without “just once posing” for the media?\

Even under various govt. health schemes, the poorer class patients go to cheaper general wards, while a senior officer from the same office will receive premium class healthcare at a private hospital. This “class-discrimination” in healthcare by govt is not justified. Wish the PM spoke about this too.

Will the PM also speak about the doctors/ health department officials and ministers who help him bring good changes in Indian Healthcare? If the entire modern medicine profession was so bad, why doesn’t the PM ban it completely and provide healthcare with different Babas and Gurus so rampant with powerful blessings today?

We so much wish that the PM speaks on an international platform how he justifies brutal violence against doctors all over India.

India deserves far better healthcare. But that starts with the facilities for majority: at the level of government-run hospitals, healthcare facilities all over India, reachable for the common man, affordable equally to all classes. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Unless all the government hospitals provide high quality free healthcare to all without discrimination, unless all the problems that the govt can resolve in a day by sanctioning adequate staff and funds for government-run healthcare are sorted out, it is futile to just increase the gap between the doctor and patient by blanket-defamation and maligning of the private healthcare on public platforms, especially international. Incidentally, our private hospitals also cater to millions of poor and the very ministers who run the country.

I have nothing personal against any political leader or party, I am hopeful of good changes happening in Indian healthcare. But I feel compelled to speak about the other side, the good doctors who are the pride of our country. I must defend the good in my profession, because I love it just as I love my patients, just as I love my India.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The King Of Merit

The King Of Merit
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

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“My work and my merit is my answer to all my fears” Yashwant Gade replied.

During first year in MBBS I once had a fight with a classmate. We belonged to two different communities, and the student body politics in medical colleges was not very evolved then. Someone tried to blow up the matter into a caste issue.

That is when I first met Yashwant Gade. He was in final MBBS, and I had seen him often engrossed in his books in the library. Curly hair, thin built, and the proud, fearless attitude of a lion. He was involved in most student activities. He listened to me patiently and immediately called my rival from the hostel, resolved our ego problems and averted what could have become an unwanted, ugly memory.

“Both of you are only medical students in this campus. A medical student cannot afford to lose even a single minute. I don’t want to hear about any fights hereafter from either of you” he warned us.
His warm nature and smiling face encouraged us to become his friends. He had the knack of saying things in a straightforward yet wise way. “Aren’t you scared of speaking your mind?” I asked him once.

“My work and my merit is my answer to all my fears” he replied.

Then we gradually realised that we were in the company of an exceptional hero.

He could not afford travelling to the school by bus, so he had walked to and from his school over five kilometres away. He stood first in the Maharashtra state in the 10th standard board exams.

He did not have money to pay the fees for junior college. The management of Shahu college invited him to join them, waiving off his fees. He did them proud when he topped the 12th standard exams in the state.

He topped all three MBBS exams in the Marathwada University. Then he won the open merit post graduate (MS) seat in Orthopaedics. The postgraduates were underpaid and over-utilised then too, but Dr. Yashwant’s younger brother had become an architect by then. He supported by paying for Dr. Yashwant’s fees.

Dr. Yashwant then naturally topped the MS Orthopaedics exam! More importantly, he appeared for the MPSC with non-medical subjects and topped the state in that exam too, in the same year as he topped the MS!

Although a topper throughout his career, the saddest aspect of merit: that it is useless unless one has money enough to sell it, hit him hard. He had no money to start a surgical set up so essential for his practice. Financial insecurity he could not afford then. He decided to do what was needed: enough stability to support the family.

He joined as a deputy collector.
He was posted in dangerous areas away from civil world, and often walked long distances just to eat his meals. He had decided to give it his best, dreaming of setting examples in administration.
It was not to be. The political interference in his work that tied his hands was too much for his self-respect to tolerate. He resigned and returned after two years, and decided to kickstart a new career.

He started working with a friend Dr. Bipin Miniyar.
In a few years, Dr. Yashwant Gade created his own identity in the Orthopedic world, simultaneously working at a government hospital as a teacher, earning his rank as Associate Professor and Head of the Department of Ortho-Oncology in the Government Cancer Hospital at Aurangabad.

In a society running after glamorous stars and scions of rich business houses, where clothes and cars and watches and houses now make a man, the greatness of a lion who fought all odds and tore through all exams to emerge first in every single one of them will appeal only to those who understand the meaning of the word “Merit”. The ability to defeat fate year after year till it has hailed you with the crown of a winner is not given to everyone.

Had he chosen to work in the developed world, I am sure he’d have a private jet by now!

Some egos stink of merit, some of their position, and most with money stink the worst. But even after winning all these three “Oscars” of life, Dr. Yashwant is as simple and down to earth as he was when I met him as a medical student.

Like respect and love, Merit cannot be bought. I am proud to know this ‘King’ of hard work and merit. He is still deep rooted in his background: maintaining a farm and encouraging the rich cultural traditions of an Indian Farmer.

Dr. Yashwant Gade, you are an outstanding role model for any medical student anywhere in the world. You are also the type of icon India desperately needs!

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Targets and Doctors: A Fatal Flaw

Targets and Doctors: A Fatal Flaw
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
“What will you become when you grow up?” a common question heard in childhood. Always weary of doing the routine and fond of a little spice in life, I had kept a list of answers to surprise and occasionally shock the questioner uncle / aunt, based upon the spontaneous dislike they generated by other questions and general behaviour and replied something like “It’s a secret” or “It depends upon when in future” etc. There is no better revenge than vagueness for some. In the moment when they paused to react to that vague answer, I would make an innocent face and ask “What was your percentage when you were my age?”. Then the explanations of how things were more difficult and in general marks were lower back then were very entertaining! Curiously, those uncles / aunties did not ask me further questions. Target hit.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
For the better and polite class of grown ups, I had the standard answers that my parents would like: Doctor, Scientist etc. The real answers were too “out of the league” for the culture I grew up in then. One thing was sure: the big-eyed respect that the words “I want to be a Doctor” evoked from the listener was sure better than any other response.
Somehow the wish to become a doctor caught hold better, probably because of parental influence. Once I completed MBBS, I loved the actual interaction and started realising the enormous satisfaction potential that the skill generated. The ‘high’ of vast complicated knowledge sharpened daily by experience was superior to the ability of a non-medico to understand or praise it. It was an autonomously growing satisfaction.
Then came the thought that I want to learn more. There are better skilled people, who could treat better than me. Getting admission to MD Medicine was very difficult, there was no question of paying in private colleges as we could barely even afford the govt. medical college fees. A lot of somersaults later, I got admission. There was an explosion of medical knowledge and wisdom suddenly, and there was no choice but to comply. Good and bad patients, good and bad teachers, good and bad friends, good and bad times were all drowned by the prime necessity and survival technique of every genuine doctor: Study!© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
Ego is greedy. Mine too. After MD, there was a desire that I want the highest specialisation: DM. More battles. More scars. All worth the title. With that degree, it felt like I have won the world.
At that time if anyone had said I worked for a financial target, I would have declared a war.
Many more steps in education later, I woke up to the naked reality: however good a specialist you become, you have to either have your own multicrore hospital, or work at someone else’s. Basic medical practice is far different from specialty practice, which requires more time, more investigations, intensive care and complicated treatment strategies / surgical techniques.
When one joins a private hospital, one realises this more intensely: there really are good and bad specialists. Some are very thorough in their academic base but cannot convert that in good patient outcomes or numbers. Some are very sweet and courteous with patients but they lack proper skill, knowledge or experience. The spectrum is wider than one can imagine. Obviously like in every profession, some think of earning more money as their primary aim.
Anyone who owns a hospital must invest many crores of their private money, directly or via bank loans. Sometimes the govt. helps in reducing the cost of land. But in each case, the maintainence cost of any hospital runs usually in lakhs to crores, more with each bed added. Intensive care beds are the costliest investment.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
When the owners of any hospital invest crores of rupees, they have targets to return their loans., to maintain the expenses that run in crores again: right from 24/7 failproof electricity and water arrangements to the availability of medicines, stents, catheters etc. in the hospital premises. The nursing, reception, helper, technician staff (in most major hospitals, the staff runs in thousands) must be engaged in three shifts, and paid in time commensurate with other establishments/ professions.
The only help that comes from the govt. is initial subsidy in land / water prices. There are no tax relaxations for any hospital/ staff. 20% of all services and beds are reserved for the poor. (If anyone has doubts that the poor-reserved services are not utilised, they can verify with the charity commissioner any day). On top of this all govt. employees must be seen at pathetically low rates, and even that amount is usually pending to be paid for years if not decades.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
Add to this the profiteering that the medical insurance companies have created: on one hand twisting the arms of private hospitals to provide specialty medicare at bare minimum rates, while on the other hand declining many deserving patients medical coverage due to idiotic reasons.
In this scenario, the last thing that a corporate / private hospital can afford is a non-performing specialist, whose salary runs in lacs of rupees every month (which is what that cadre deserves).
Most corporates / private hospitals are aware of this, and usually support a budding practitioner till his practice picks up. After that, the least he / she is expected to do is to maintain that level of practice or increase it, returning the investment that the hospital has made in his growth. The provision of a furnished room, electricity, washroom, cafeteria, parking, staff and salary to a non-performing or underperforming doctor is not affordable for every hospital.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
This generated the word “Target”, which was quickly coloured villainous by many. Which financial endeavour can be run without setting financial targets? If anyone is naïve enough to think that all hospital owners will invest their hard earned crores for charity and leave the returns to fate, they must get examined by a qualified practitioner. If the hospital cannot generate enough profit money, there won’t be any growth in medical technology. If they cannot repay loans, the hospital will be confiscated by banks.
Many hospitals of excellent doctors have closed down because they could not sustain the charity they attempted. Indian poverty and healthcare need is beyond the capacity of even the govt. to cope up with, so to expect a private company / doctor / hospital to provide free / concessional high quality continuous medical care to everyone can only be a fool’s dream. This applies to the MRI centers, diagnostic facilities, labs, physiotherapy units etc. where multiple crores are invested.
Some hospitals realised the potential of profit making in this “Target setting” and turned greedy. Mostly good specialists do not stay at such hospitals. Even if most hospitals pinch most doctors to achieve certain numbers, not every specialist works to achieve that target. I know many who would rather keep their ethics and be good clinicians, still staying in the lesser favourite class of management, rather than selling their ethics to shine among the administrators.
The notion that “Every specialist in every big hospital is working to achieve targets by deceiving the patient” is a fatal flaw developing in the mind of our society . Fatal because this also generates fear of going to the right specialist or reaching too late for them to be able to save life.© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
If I cannot afford a Mercedes, I will drive the car I can actually afford, rather than blaming and maligning the entire car industry. Many other cheaper, equally safer options are available for travel.
The problem is, everyone wants the best, highest class of super specialty medical care in luxurious set-ups, at the price list of a sarkari dawakhana. Most doctors who studied in govt. hospitals know that the quality of doctors is very good there too, but if we give that option to the patient, they say “No, not in sarkari” because they want to avoid long lines and “general population treatment”.
As the doctor is the only responsible face that the patient sees in the hospital, many obviously end up thinking that every penny they pay is going to the doctor, at least in percentage. Many will be surprised to know that a doctor usually gets less than 10 % of the total hospital bill as his fees in most cases.
Few will understand that the real “Target” that most doctors work for is to do good to the patient, to save lives. Millions of successful treatment and surgical outcomes from the corporate and other hospitals are a proof of this.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande
Dedicated to the private hospitals started with the aim of making available specialty medical care for the society and caught up in unfair, unjust allegations because everyone wants free healthcare.
PS: There are greedy doctors and hospitals, like in every other profession. This article is not about them. It is wrong to advise patients unnecessary procedures / tests to achieve financial targets. This article is to explain to the society that target setting is essential for any hospital where recurring investment in new technology and maintenance is also the responsibility of the owner.
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The God Pendulum

The God Pendulum
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Dr. Aman handed over his car to the valet, and went to the rooftop restaurant, his favourite rendezvous. The captain soon brought over his favourite coffee pot and some starters.

‘The look of love’ by Kenny G started playing. It is impossible not to feel inner peace and romance while listening to that piece. Dr. Aman started to think. Yes. He had much in life to sort out.

Sunday late afternoon. The only afternoon to relax if lucky. A moment of peace so precious, that even family duties take a back seat, the mind is so tired of the heavy duty medical practice. Heavy duty because mistakes are not allowed, and seldom forgiven. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

It is difficult to relax at home too. The society security staff, maids, some ‘sudden’ old friends from god-knows-what-stage-of past will want home consultation, and it is rude for a doctor to say no to any health queries by anyone, anytime, anywhere. Cellphones have become the worst health hazards, more so for the doctors.

He had two patients under his care in the hospital, so he decided not to switch off the cellphone, he was responsible should they have any problem in the hospital.

The phone of course rang.

“Sir, casualty. One GP has referred for you an old lady with convulsions. She is quite bad” the medical CR appeared disturbed.

“On my way” said Dr. Aman, paid his bills, and reached the hospital. On the way he kept on giving intructions to the junior doctor.

The 65 year old lady had had fever for a week, not taken to the doctor, treated by her non-medico daughter and son with home remedies. On the seventh day, yesterday, she had had many vomitings and became unconscious. The local GP gave her some basic treatment, and sent her to the city as she had no facility to treat such a critical case. Since that morning she had also had convulsions.

She was already intubated in the critical care unit when Dr. Aman reached. CT scan of her brain was normal. Her sodium levels turned out to be dangerously low. The management requires skilful vigilance, and it was already started. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Her daughter and son were waiting outside the ICU. Dr. Aman updated them about her condition.

The angry son asked “Why is her sodium low? Is it because of the medicines given by the doctor yesterday? I it the side effect of those medicines?”

Dr. Aman had now acquired the skills to tame his anger. He told that it was because of the vomitings, and that they should have taken her to the doctor earlier when she had fever.

The daughter started with an emotional appeal, speaking loudly “Do whatever you want, doctor, please save my mother. You are like God to us. Nothing should happen to her. We are ready to do anything. Please save her”.

“We are trying our best. Let’s hope she recovers” Dr. Aman said the legally correct thing.

“So when will she become normal?” asked the patient’s son.

“It is not predictable, we need to reassess her after convulsions stop and sodium levels are corrected” Dr. Aman replied. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“So why don’t you correct her sodium levels right now?” asked the son, as looking at the surrounding relatives as if he was suggesting the obvious that the doctor had missed.

“If sodium is corrected faster than a certain rate, she will develop paralysis, it can also be permanent” Dr. Aman replied, and added “Look, boss, if you do not have trust in our treatment and skills, you can please shift her to any other hospital you wish.”

“No. no doctor. We trust you. You are like God for us. We brought her here because this hospital is big and famous, and has all facilities” said the daughter. The son just kept on looking angrily at the doctors.

On the third day, the lady became conscious. On the fourth day, she was off the ventilator.

“When will she be shifted out?” the daughter asked.

“After a day of observation in the ICU” said the junior doctor.

“Why is it necessary to be in ICU now?” asked the son.

“Because she still has fluctuating oxygen levels, and needs continuous observation” replied Dr. Aman. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

“Why cannot you observe her in the ward room? The ICU is so costly” the angry son kept muttering.

On the fifth day they requested discharge, as the patient was walking. Her weakness was still fluctuating, and her BP was low. She was discharged on request.

Within an hour, a crowd surrounded Dr. Aman.

“What is this? Is this any bill? Are you doctor or a thief?” the daughter started shouting, to a full audience of the waiting patients.

“Listen. You knew these charges when she was admitted. I do not own this hospital. The rates are standard, and so are the criteria for free or concessional patients. Please speak to the billing department.” Dr. Aman kept his tone low still. He did not want to point at the two costly cellphones that the son flaunted.

They did not qualify for free treatment as per the govt. norms.

“Doctor your fees is also there in the bill. Atleast cut that off. We cannot afford.” The son insisted. The waiting crowd surrounding them stared at the face of Dr. Aman. “Will the doctor be human and help this poor?” was the mob expression.

To save time, Dr. Aman asked the billing clerk to scratch off all his consultation fees. Saved time is more precious than earned money for the doctor.

While leaving, the daughter looked angrily at Dr. Aman and said “We never thought that doctors will be so rude and commercial. Curse upon such doctors who extract money from the poor”.

A doctor must digest all kinds. All patients who had witnessed the scene were doubtful and upset. They knew nothing about the patient and what had actually happened. They had just witnessed the last scene.

Just five days later, the whole family returned in panic. The lady had developed many convulsions as she had stopped the medicines after going home. Now she was unconscious because of the low oxygen that had damaged her brain. This could take a long time. © Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The daughter started “You are God, Doctor, please save her” etc. etc.

Dr. Aman gave instructions about the basic management to the emergency team, then turned to the daughter and said “I am sorry. I am busy with other patients, please take her to another doctor or hospital. I cannot attend her”.

“Can you refuse a patient?” asked the son, as if he had taken a special training from Mr. Ram Jethmalani.

“Yes, I can” said Dr. Aman “No one can expect a doctor to take correct decisions under duress, threats or abuse, and if I think there’s risk to my life or reputation because of ill behaved, hostile relatives, I can even refuse emergencies”.

There was no guilt in his mind when he started the car. He had become a doctor to serve the sick and suffering. Those who did not value him, his work and his profession did not deserve his service. His dignity was as important as his humanity, he would not sacrifice it for those who didn’t deserve it.

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

The Sweetest Pinnacle Of Life

The Sweetest Pinnacle Of Life© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

To many students who are lost in their search for the right aims and goals in life, who trusted me enough to ask that question, I have suggested that they imagine what they actually want in their life at its Pinnacle.

Success, riches, fame, awards and accolades, a legacy, achievements are all good to show and leave behind oneself. The truth is far more than that. Love and care, affection and respect in one’s evening of life is what everyone deserves, but few are fortunate to achieve. For what good is s life that spends its aged years in desolation, isolation, despair of an uncaring, loveless family one has sacrificed much to bring up well?

Hollow words of “show- love” and “pretend care” are commonly employed everywhere, especially among the rich, educated and culture-claiming pundits of humanity.

One experience I have is worth sharing: that the poorest of the poor, like the farmer in the wheelchair here, are cared for with far more genuine love and affection than many. This family collected alms and help to get him to India, and never asked for any concessions, free treatment etc., always saying they were willing to do anything for the happiness and health of this grandpa. His son standing by his side is an illiterate farmer, but is caring for his father . quoting proudly “He brought me up!”. There is no smell of “I am obliging my parent” in his behaviour.

I have met hundreds of Arabic Muslim patients who care for their parents, sons and daughters equally well, willing and with total faith in the treating doctor. It does not change with their financial status. They insist on the parents staying with them, ask questions about their food, exercise, medicines, happiness and comply strictly with the given instructions.

They naturally do not know the words “Culture, Rights, Medicolegal, Elderly care, Nursing Homes, Mercy Killing etc.”. Rarely have I seen them unemotionally “okay” with a bad diagnosis of a parent.

This old man, in my personal opinion, is one of the luckiest human beings upon earth!

© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

Thank you, Mr. Naser Ali, Mr. Abdul Hakim Mohd. Al Malahi, Mr. Majdi Jamil Aiselwi, Mr. Ahmed Anwar Aqlan!

The Definition Of Love

 

The Definition Of Love
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande

claude-and-marie
How frequently do we use the phrase “True Love”! As if there existed some other form of Love..
Mr. Claude Gatien, a farmer from the city of Tours in France, decided at the age of 36 that he wants to change his career. He started to work as a music salesman, selling CDs. Eventually he got a job as an assistant to a psychotherapist in Paris.
He met Ms. Marie Briquet there. She was a social worker, dedicating all her time to the sick as a volunteer. He respected her work, and helped her often. They fell in love. She told him she was having some mild neurological symptoms, mainly tremor and fatigue.
His thinking was as innocently clear as the first rays of a rising sun. Love was the only bond and the most precious thing between them. They stayed together, and started taking care of each other.
The psychotherapist who they worked with was a spiritual man, with immense love for India, mainly for its spirituality. Like most with a heart, he followed his calling. By then, Claude and Marie had developed the same affection towards spirituality, and followed their ‘Spiritual Guru’ to India.
“We fell in love with India”, Claude told me; “because for some reason I find that my mind is at peace here. We have everything in France, still we felt happier in India, because there is so much spirituality in the region, and even among its people”.
They are staying together for over 27 years now. “We never thought of marriage as we thought it is not necessary to perform rituals to prove either love or honesty of intention” Claude said, after consulting Marie in cute French. “It was her answer, but I feel the same” he added, winking!
Multiple Sclerosis, that scary disease of brain and spine, took away Marie’s ability to walk over 5 years ago. She has become almost completely dependent and wheelchair bound. Claude attends her 24/365. “I enjoy caring for her. It gives me many more opportunities to tell her how much I love her” he says.
Mostly people swear about anything that they want others to believe. A teacher taught me long ago never to “swear or promise”, but instead keep every word, complete every commitment without using the words “Promise or Swear”. “Everything you say is actually your commitment” he infused. I met the personification of that principle in Claude.
About a month ago, Marie suddenly had to be admitted in the ICU for some serious complication. Needless to say, Claude was by her side all the time. She was unconscious for over two days. One late night I had to attend some call, and went to the ICU to check if there was a change in her condition. Claude was sitting by her side, sleepy but awake, looking at her face.
“I can wait here for some time. Do you want to take a nap?” I asked him.
“Oh no, Thank you doctor. I won’t sleep till she wakes up. If she wakes up and does not see me, she will worry about me. That may stress her. Once she opens eyes, I will tell her she is ok, make her smile, then I will sleep” he said.
That was a month ago. They came for a visit yesterday. I requested their permission to share their love story. He said he was willing, then asked for her permission.
Then I saw the beautiful smile that had made Claude fall in love with Marie.
“Yes.. She says this is all there is to share about life.” Claude told me, translating.
© Dr. Rajas Deshpande